Parents in California who are getting a divorce might be worried about the welfare of their children. One way to reassure children during and after a divorce is by working to reduce upheaval in the child's life. Some changes are inevitable, and depending on the situation, they may range from different homes and schools to adjusting to new partners for their parents. However, parents can help by avoiding any unnecessary changes and assisting children in dealing with the ones that are necessary.
Parents should also strive to cooperate with their exes. Forgiving a former spouse might seem impossible, but at the very least, parents should aim for not fighting in front of their children.
Finally, parents should also be careful that they do not neglect themselves. They should take necessary steps for self-care because reducing stress means that they can be available for their children as needed. Primarily, children need to know that they are loved and secure.
There are ways that parents may be able to ease the transition as well. Just as a judge attempts to make decisions with the best interests of the child in mind, parents should keep in mind that children usually benefit from contact with both parents. Therefore, divorcees should avoid blocking the other parent's access to the child unless there are serious problems such as abuse.
Parents can also use mediation to develop some conflict resolution skills and strategies. They might want to address certain concerns in the parenting agreement. For example, parents might want to specify a certain amount of time before a child is introduced to a parent's new partner or include rules about holidays and vacations. This kind of framework may help minimize conflict. In more serious circumstances, divorced parents may need to settle such disagreements in court.