For many fathers who are divorcing the mothers of their children, the prospect of negotiating a custody agreement that keeps them significantly in the picture may seem slim. Many fathers attempt to maintain equal involvement in children's lives, only to see a court grant great preference to mothers in custody issues, even in California, which is often seen as progressive in legal matters.
If you are a father who wants to ensure that you and your children's mother can reach a truly fair custody agreement, you should consider divorce mediation. Mediation can even help you reach a reasonable agreement if the two of you cannot seem to be in the same room and function fairly.
For many years, negotiating a custody agreement has been a nightmare for many fathers, because the law often favors mothers when a court steps in to help create a custody agreement. However, with divorce mediation, this nightmare can be a thing of the past.
Do not wait to reach out to an experienced divorce negotiator if you are ready to set a fair, reasonable tone to your divorce and keep the court out of your life decisions.
Mediation is about recognizing the rights and needs of every party
If you are divorcing the mother of your children, you may have trouble seeing a way to keep things civil between the two of you. However, finding a way to reset the tone of your relationship can help create a healthy space to work together for your children, even if one or both of you has gravely offended the other party.
Fathers who fear how a court may rule against their privileges can greatly benefit from meditation, both legally and practically.
Legally, it is always better for both parties if you can reach and agreement without letting a court get involved, and the court will respect the terms of an agreement that parents reach in mediation.
One of the great advantages of mediation is that it allows an impartial party to help parents overcome their differences for the sake of their children. Many couples may think that their dynamic is too combative to allow mediation to function, but a skilled mediator can help the process progress without both parties physically present.
This way, even if you and your children's mother cannot negotiate fairly in each others' presence, you can still keep the courts out of your personal lives, which is almost always preferable.
Also, this approach helps set the tone for your ongoing relationship with your children's mother, and may even help you find middle ground to have a better working relationship together moving forward.
After all, the mother of your children is important to their lives just as you are, and it is always wise to find ways to work together rather than adjacent to each other.
A skilled mediator protects all parties
Mediation is not a way to manipulate or control a situation, but rather an opportunity to recalibrate the direction of your relationship. Just because you are divorcing your children's mother doesn't mean that you will cease to be in her life, and she in yours.
With the guidance of an experienced mediator, you can ensure that you retain your rights as a parent and maintain a healthy and robust role in your children's lives.
Source: Nov. 30, -0001