If you and the other parent agree on a custody solution, you can go through a relatively simple process to adjust your agreement.
You and your child’s other parent should revisit your agreement every few years to ensure that it still suits your child’s needs.
When you cannot agree on a new child custody agreement and need court intervention or mediation, you must complete a specific process to modify your child custody agreement.
Some local courts require parents to go through mediation before the court will address their case. Your county clerk or your attorney could help you determine whether this applies to your county.
Whether you can reach an agreement or require mediation or court involvement, modifying a child custody order can help you meet your child’s needs and protect their interests.
]]>According to recent polls, 61% of people admit that they’re not exactly candid about their finances with their spouses. That’s called financial infidelity, and it can have serious consequences for a relationship, from trust issues to legal troubles.
Financial infidelity can take numerous different forms, but here are some of the most common:
Whatever the reason, hiding a bank account or credit card from a partner can lead to devastating financial consequences and significant trust issues — and that can lead to a divorce.
If that’s your situation, you’re not alone – but you do need to proceed cautiously. A spouse that’s shown every indication that they’re willing to lie to get their way about something or avoid direct conflict may also not be forthcoming about their financials during your divorce, either. Having experienced legal guidance is wise.
]]>Whether you’re in a happy marriage or one that’s kind of rocky, you should learn about some factors that can lead to divorce. This may help you to save your marriage or decide that it really is a lost cause.
Different financial goals and beliefs can cause significant issues in a marriage. It’s a good idea to have discussions about money matters before you get married so you know if you have the same beliefs.
Communication that wanes as the relationship goes on can make it impossible to stay married. Both parties have to be able to communicate openly with each other. Neither should feel bad about how they feel.
Infidelity, even when there’s no physical connection, can cause a marriage to dissolve. Emotional cheating shows interest outside of the marriage. Infidelity often causes resentment and it may be difficult to overcome those feelings.
Common goals and visions are usually present at the start of a marriage. As time passes, each spouse might begin to develop new interests. While that’s perfectly normal, the problem comes in when the goals and visions of the spouses are opposites.
Living with an addict is challenging, but a spouse will likely try to stick things out and try to get the person the help they need to get sober. When help is pushed away and the person refuses treatment, it might spell doom for the marriage.
Anyone considering ending their marriage should ensure they take steps ahead of time to protect themselves as long as it’s safe to do so. Working with someone who can help you to learn your options and evaluate them so you can make the decisions that are best for your needs.
]]>Of course, living near your children is crucial if you have a parenting plan that requires frequent custody exchanges. The greater the distance between your home and the home of the other parent, the more difficult it can become to maintain frequent custody exchanges as the standard.
Can your ex move to the other side of the state or leave California altogether when you share custody of your children?
Sometimes you will recognize that your ex has a very good reason for wanting to move to Wyoming with the children. After all, that is where their family is or where the headquarters for their employer operates.
In a situation where you recognize that your ex moving with the children will be the best-case scenario for the family, you can cooperate with them and negotiate a new parenting plan, possibly one where the children come back to spend the summers and every winter break from school with you. If you agree to the move, the modification request will proceed uncontested.
If you don’t believe they have a good reason for the move and can’t agree with the suggestion, then you may end up headed back to family court for a contested modification hearing. When you disagree about whether changes should occur and what the right changes would be, a judge may have to hear from both of you and then make a decision that they believe would be in the best interests of the children.
Typically, your ex will need to provide both you and the family courts with advanced notice before attempting to relocate with the children. If you contest their decision to move, you may be able to ask for the courts to award you more time with the children and to allow them to stay here in California with you.
Any evidence you have that your ex simply wants to interfere in your relationship with your children could help you when fighting back against a relocation requests that you worry would sever your bond with your children. Learning more about the rules that apply to California custody modification requests can help you prepare for the future challenges you may face as a parent with shared custody of your children.
]]>To help you address this, here are some frequently asked questions that shed light on how people tend to get along after divorce. Every situation is unique, of course, but this can help you know how to proceed.
Cooperation is vital. It is clear that co-parents definitely need to understand how to cooperate and even defer to one another. Don’t spend all of your energy always trying to “win” against your ex. Instead, put the children first and be willing to compromise or collaborate with your ex in a way that makes their life better.
In some cases, there are stories of couples spending a significant amount of time together and even going on family vacations. This can be very good for the children if they enjoy seeing both parents and having those experiences. It is not advisable for everyone, however, as you definitely need to be able to get along in a way that a lot of divorced couples simply find too difficult. And there is nothing wrong with understanding that and knowing how to set proper boundaries.
Ideally, you and your co-parent will be able to go to your children’s events jointly. You can go to things like a graduation ceremony or a football game or a drama club production. You’re also going to need to talk about things like birthday parties, Christmas celebrations and other events that both parents would generally be present for. You’re not obligated to do these things together, but some parents choose to as a way to provide a fun and healthy experience for their children.
These are just a few things to address in your parenting plan, and you can see why it’s so important to understand all of your legal options as you do so.
]]>Your insider perspective may make you nervous about moving forward despite your desire for safety and freedom. You may worry that shared custody arrangements could put your children at unnecessary risk.
It is normal and admirable to worry about your children when in a dangerous situation and contemplating divorce. If you understand how the California family courts handle allegations of domestic violence, you may feel more comfortable moving forward with the end of your marriage.
The California family courts have a clear directive when they must make custody decisions. State law requires that family law judges put what is best for the children first. For most families, the best interests of the children will necessitate a shared custody arrangement so that they maintain their bond with both parents.
However, there are situations in which the courts agree that sole custody is preferable. A significant history of domestic violence is one of them. You will need evidence corroborating your claims of domestic violence, as otherwise your ex can claim you have fabricated the allegations as a way to alienate them from the children.
A journal detailing your experiences, photographs of injuries, police reports and medical records can all help you show the courts that your ex has violent tendencies. They may adjust their custody decisions to reflect that knowledge.
Your ex does not need to turn their violent temper against your children for a judge to limit their time with or control over the children. Abuse that occurs in front of the children can do psychological damage, and a judge may consider abuse aimed at you rather than the children when making major custody decisions.
In cases where there have been threats or significant physical injuries, you may be able to get an order from the courts helping protect you and limiting how much access your ex has to you and the children. Getting the right support will make divorcing in a domestic violence scenario and securing appropriate custody arrangements easier.
]]>In California, you and your spouse have a right to enter into a separation agreement. This agreement can go over all the different parts of your separation such as child visitation, child support, custody, alimony and property division.
The state doesn’t require you to have a formal separation period, but there is a six-month cooling-off period that you will need to abide by. This requires at least six months to pass before the divorce can be entered after you file.
The separation date matters because it helps you break down who gets what based on the date you stopped living together. For example, the value of a piece of property on the date when you separated might matter when you divide the value.
You do have to keep in mind that legal separations don’t end marriages and that you will still need to go through a full divorce. That being said, the legal separation does legally separate your finances and signals the date you officially left the relationship.
The legal separation contract helps guide all kinds of issues ranging from custody concerns to child support.
No, and interestingly, you don’t have to get a divorce after you separate, either. Sometimes, people choose to legally separate and get back together. Other times, they legally separate and later divorce. You don’t technically need a legal separation before you divorce, but if you plan to live apart and want to separate your finances, for example, then it may be a good idea.
A legal separation could be a good tool to use in your case if you would like to live apart from your spouse. It’s worth looking into it and deciding if it could be helpful as you consider a divorce over the next few months.
]]>What they’ll do is simply close down the account, take all of the money out of it, and start an individual account on their own. They will then redirect their payments to this new account, and they think they have solved some of these financial issues. But there’s one big problem with doing it this way.
The problem is that you and your spouse both own the money that is in a joint account. It is marital property and it needs to be divided between the two of you.
So it may make sense to you to close the account down if you think that your spouse is going to steal the money, but doing so just means that you are the one who now has taken the money from them . This could lead to all sorts of issues in your divorce case. You are better off to either talk with them about dividing the money or to simply stop depositing new money into the account, freezing it until the existing balance gets divided during property division.
In order to avoid mistakes and to get what you deserve out of the divorce, be sure you carefully consider your legal options.
]]>By definition, financial infidelity occurs when couples who share their finances lie about money. This could include:
Financial infidelity can cause problems during a marriage if it’s discovered, as one person may feel hurt or disrespected. During a divorce, this infidelity could lead to difficult conversations about who should be responsible for repaying debts or if certain hidden assets should become shared assets and be split.
Usually, the worst-case scenario is one in which a spouse doesn’t tell their partner about their debts or assets and the other partner finds out on their own. This can lead to issues with trust. The better way to handle this kind of situation is to be reasonable about the situation. Sit down and talk to your spouse about additional assets or debts that you have and that they don’t know about. They may be unhappy, but they may not be as upset or hurt as if they had found out on their own.
Financial infidelity can be problematic during a divorce, especially because California views property as shared community property. That means that by law, you’re technically expected to equally split all shared assets and debts upon divorce. That may not be reasonable in this kind of situation, so you may want to talk to your spouse about negotiating a different arrangement, such as setting aside certain debts as their own rather than asking you to cover them.
You have options if financial infidelity comes to light. The right approach could help you resolve those debts and give you a better opportunity to get the assets you need out of your marriage.
]]>Now, at a time when you’ve left your career to take care of your children, you’re frustrated by changes in your husband’s behavior. He seems overly concerned about financial issues, asks you when you’ll go back to work instead of being a stay-at-home parent and generally disrespects you. You’re mad because he’s taking overtime when the money isn’t needed, so he’s never at home with the kids.
These are common marital problems, and they could lead to divorce. Here are some other common causes of divorce to watch out for.
Substance abuse is a common cause of marital strife and divorce. People who become addicted to drugs or alcohol may start to have relationship issues at home and become problematic at work. Those issues could lead to serious financial strain and consequences.
Cheating or infidelity are also common causes of marriages ending. When one partner decides to cheat, they’re often committing an unforgivable act. While going through marriage counseling could help, many people do end up divorcing instead.
Marriages often fail because of money issues. If one person isn’t contributing financially, they may feel frustrated or hurt when they’re accused of not providing enough to the family. When one person does all the work that brings in an income, they may feel like the other person is taking advantage of them.
If there isn’t enough money to go around, this just makes the issue more serious.
When you first start noticing problems, it’s time to take action. Talk to your spouse about getting help for substance abuse, consider marriage counseling or discuss financial options to get back on track. If you can’t find a resolution, then a divorce could be the right choice for you as your marriage continues to be a source of stress in your life.
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