The benefits of parallel parenting after a divorce

On Behalf of The Law Offices of Ronda A. Middleton |

When parents in California are going through a divorce, they might struggle to communicate and cooperate. Raising children can be difficult in the midst of a high-conflict divorce. However, in most cases, parents either share custody or one has visitation rights. Therefore, these parents need to find a way to make the situation work. Studies show that witnessing parental conflict is among the biggest stressors for children during divorce. Parallel parenting is a solution that allows children to spend time with both households but reduces the need for exes to communicate directly with one another.

To avoid conflict, parallel parents need a detailed plan. They also need a way to get information to each other. Some parents may decide to use email for communication or to share calendars. While traditional co-parents work to respect and support their children’s relationship with both households, parallel parents work to stay out of the way. By letting go of control, they further reduce the possibility of conflict.

Parallel parenting does require that exes agree on some major issues, such as religion and education. Parents may find that they are able to communicate on other issues and get along over time. Children may also want schedule changes as they get older and have different needs.

Parents might still be able to avoid litigation by going through mediation. Mediation can help parents come to an agreement on child custody and visitation even if they’re experiencing a great deal of conflict. Its aim is to work toward a solution that suits both parties. In contrast, litigation is adversarial and often has a winning and a losing side. Attorneys may be able to assist couples in negotiations so they do not have to communicate with one another. However, even if couples must go to litigation, they can still practice parallel parenting.

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